Forgiveness

Today I got a Skype call from one of my dear cousins who is going through a hard time and needed someone to talk to. One thing she said that is now stuck in my head, was how did you forgive your parents? I want to say enough but not too much which is a bit hard for me. I had a difficult childhood but filled with so many good times as well. I can honestly say the good outweighs the bad but there was bad, and plenty of it. We had every problem you could think of, from being illegal, to moving every month because we couldn't pay the rent, to drugs, alcohol and physical abuse along with a lot of emotional abuse as well. I moved out when I was 15 and not by choice, and became the sole income and both "parents" to my siblings. Even now, the 10 year ban that I have is because of a decision they made. I'm not trying to make myself a victim but if I ever wrote a tell all, you would be stunned to hear everything that I have survived and with a smile on my face. But back to the forgiveness. My parents were and still are to some extent two sick people who need help. Not in the sick, I have the flu kind of way. But in the, they are emotionally unstable and extremely scared by their own past kind of way. How could I hold a gurgle against the people who brought me into this world? Who have tried, in their own way, to provide us with everything they could when we did live together. I have forgiven them for everything and pray that they can learn from their mistakes and be better people. In the Bible it talks about how we need to forgive others in order for God to forgive us. That alone has helped me a lot in overcoming all of this. One thing I want to make very clear is that my parents are both good people, who just never got past their own demons. Anger is a horrible thing to hold onto, it's like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. I am grateful for where I am today emotionally. I have had a lot of great family and friends to help guide me along the way. One thing my amazing friend Dina once told me after I told her about my 10 year ban was that this is just a pebble compared to all of the other obstacles I have overcome. And when I take a step back I feel like it really is. Then I begin to think of all the blessings I do have and how fortunate I am. And how my suffering is nothing compared to others. I also know that God is amazing and has blessed me with an incredible husband and daughter to get me through anything. I want to end on a happy note. Forgive others and don't let that hurt or anger overcome you. God has much better things planned for you so free yourself from all of that and be happy. Be happy that you woke up today, that the sun is shinning and you have a roof over your head and food to eat every day. Life is good, you only need to take a moment to look around to realize it.